Friday, 10 August 2012

Terror in the Skies!

Several years ago, I read Erich von Däniken's Chariots of the Gods?, and for a couple of months after that I was completely sold on the idea that we were visited by intelligent beings from other planets, at the dawn of civilization, and that all the ancient carvings and statues, supposedly of gods, were actually depicting those visitors wowing us with their technological know-how. Then once I tried discussing it with other people, as well as putting a bit of rational thought towards it, I realised it was complete and utter bollocks. Still, for that short space of time it was nice to have my view of the universe altered - I'd definitely recommend reading that book if you haven't, just don't take it seriously, 'kay?

This morning, I read something else, something NEW - something that no matter how much I think about it, I can't find any holes in it. A theory bandied about over the decades but one that's never really been given a lot of exposure. Something that had me grinning and laughing with the "Oh My!"-ness of it all - something that when I've tried to talk about with people in my daily life it's all fell to pieces because I was too excited. Something that's instantly made the whole world seem at once a lot more interesting, a lot more exciting, and a WHOLE lot more terrifying. That thing?

Giant airborne jellyfish.

Where did I read this? Why, the Fortean Times, of course! If you don't read this magazine, you really should - completely impartial, completely open to new ideas, and completely sceptical all at once. If there's something happening in the world that's remotely "out of the ordinary", it can be found within the pages of this magazine. The lead article of the current issue is  written by Scott Deschaine, who's primarily a comics writer, but don't let that dissuade you - a good imagination also leads to a good, open way of thinking. And open thinking is EXACTLY what's required when dealing with such strangeness as this.

The theory, in one sentence, is this: UFOs and the like are not alien spacecraft, but are actually aerial invertebrates. I know what you're thinking. Ridiculous? Stupid? Mad? Absurd? No! Deschaine has put forward a VERY convincing case here, and if passing it on to the six or seven people who read this blog helps spread the theory, all the better!

Look at it like this, okay - over 70% of the planet's surface is covered by water. 94% of the Earth's known living creatures are aquatic, and there's still 95% of the underwater world that is yet to be explored. Every living thing needs water to live, that's a given. Now then, the Earth's atmosphere? That's five million times the volume of the oceans. Which is a LOT of unexplored space. And a big enough cloud easily contains the same amount of water as a shallow lake. It's already been scientifically established that there's life in the clouds - algae, bacteria, fungal spores, viruses, pollen, tiny insects and the like. It even has its own society, the International Association for Aerobiology. So already its accepted that there is something up there.

And now we distinguish what is thought to be up there from what is thought to be out there. How's this sound: when someone reports a UFO, it's a mechanical spacecraft from some far-flung corner of the galaxy, and upon arrival at our planet it does nothing but hover about for a bit and then disappear. OR... When someone reports a UFO, it's a rare sighting of something that's always there, something that belongs here, but something that doesn't get seen all that often. The human race isn't as omnipresent as it likes to think it is.

Deschaine lists ten ways in which UFOs are similar to our jelly-based friends, based on appearance, bioluminescence, movement, individual behaviour, group behaviour, life cycles, feeding, effects of humans, physical traces and likely habitats. I'm not going to go into detail on all of those here, but will at least TRY and explain things.

First of all, let's look at the general shape reported in UFO sightings. There's the classic saucer-shaped UFO:

And then there's the cigar-shaped UFO:

Compare these to the common underwater invertebrates, the jellyfish and the squid:

UFO witnesses have reported "craft" shaped like ice cream cones, shuttlecocks, parachutes... Noticing the similarities? They've even described them as jellyfish!

How about the translucent appearances of some UFO sightings? Most marine invertebrates are composed primarily of water - in a similar way, muses Mr. Deschaine, airborne invertebrates would be composed mainly of gas and water vapours, save for the gelatinous disc of muscle that helps propel them about the place - which would be the only piece visible to us lot on the ground.

And the strange lights and colours of a UFO? That's just bioluminescence!

Look at the often-reported "impossible" movements of this UFO:

Compared with the marine transportation methods - the pulsing and hovering of the jellyfish, the rocketing and the hovering of the squid...

Squid and jellyfish are both predatory hunters - both fairly high up on the food chain in their environments, eating anything they can get hold of (plankton, fish eggs, small fish and crustaceans, other jellyfish etc.), so what would an airborne jellyfish eat? Besides the potential for plenty of other species to munch on up there, the existence of such creatures could also explain another mystery that is usually UFO-related - cattle mutilations! "Glowing discs" are often reported shortly before livestock are found drained of internal organs, or turned inside out of whatever. Sometimes the carcasses are found at the top of a tree. 

And it's not just the cows and sheep that have giant tentacles to fear - consider that in the United States alone, 2,300 people per day are reported missing. Deschaine's not saying that they were all eaten by jellyfish, but what of the reports of visible occupants inside UFOs - could we be looking at a jellyfish with a full belly? There's certainly the odd UFO "survival story" - cars being attacked and whatnot.

Even if we're not digested, there's been plenty of UFO "attacks" reported - and here's a REALLY weird one. Looking at lists of physiological effects of jellyfish stings and UFO encounters, there's a whole load of shared symptoms - eye irritation; skin swelling; blistering; heart attacks; lung damage; nausea; vomiting; kidney damage; destruction of skeletal muscles; destruction of red blood cells; disruption of the nervous system; loss of coordination; numbness; paralysis; headaches; agitation; panic; seizures; comas; depression; apathy; hallucinations... 

So, with the existence of these lifeforms in our atmosphere, we can explain away UFOs, cattle mutilation, and so much more. How about ball lightning? Earthquake lights? Star jelly? Think about it! Even when it rains fish, frogs, or blood, this could be traced to the flying invertebrates - a large aquatic jellyfish could potentially be a "living island" for hundreds of smaller creatures. Were it to metamorphose from an aquatic to an atmospheric jellyfish, it would purge itself of water and anything else within. This could be a constant phenomenon around the oceans of the world, but on very rare occasions it would happen above land, leading to the international news reports of fish falls.

And the best part of this theory? There's ALREADY undeniable scientific proof that there's stuff living in the sky, from as early as 1962, when John Glenn was orbiting the Earth and he reported thousands of glowing fireflies, not to mention the scientifically accepted "sprites" - colossal, jellyfish-like aerial phenomena discovered on top of thunderstorms. 35 miles high (or higher!), that definitely aren't new forms of lightning, in that they've been seen "persisting" for longer than 30 minutes. They emit a deep infrasound and huge gravitational waves, appear in groups and interact with one another.

And what about the sceptical types? The best that they can come up with is that they sound like a species of Pokémon. Hardly a reasoned argument! Think what you will of all this, but it makes a lot more sense than other "different" theories - visitors from another planet, Creationism, that whole 2012 thing...

Apparently, Mr. Deschaine is working on a TV show that will use the latest available technologies to "seek new life in previously unexplored atmospheric habitats" - massively exciting times, indeed!

Apologies if you think it's all a load of nonsense, but... This is a big thing! People are always wondering about life on other planets, but when there's apparently so much crazy stuff that hasn't been discovered on our own planet yet... It's incomprehensible, and also terrifying in a wholly thrilling way.

2016 update of sorts:

Have a look at the comments below for a "first-hand account" from a Mr. Chris Jenson, which is interesting enough in itself... and something that was brought to my attention this morning as well - a Nobel Prize-nominated mathematician, cosmologist and physicist has made a new kind of telescope that can observe antimatter-light, and whilst testing it picked up some images of these "Invisible Terrestrial Entities" (as he's called them). Have a look, here.


  1. Look into gel raining from the sky. In one place the gel was identified as have the DNA of Jellyfish. In Everett, WA gel that had human white blood cells rained down. Also of interest might is star jelly. I do believe things might be living up there but at the risk of sounding like a loony I have seen a light in the sky that could have not been an animal and was for sure not a man made object. Very interesting post.

  2. interesting stuff thb...

  3. That's not the sort of theory that makes me excited. It's the sort that makes me feel terrified and nauseated. Giant jellyfish and squid in the sky. It's enough to make you never wish to leave the house again.

    Two things though:

    1. What theories are there on how these things manage to stay airborne? All that we understand about flight is defied by the physicalities of squid and jellyfish - physicalities that are suited to an aquatic life.

    2. How do they account for the fact that no collisions have been reported between these beasts and aircraft? Even if "unexplained airline accidents" could be accounted to this phenomenon, surely the black box would feature all manner of "OH GOD THE TENTACLES" recordings?

    1. Got you on those ones!

      The answers to both of your questions are given fully in the magazine - I wasn't about to lift a 6 page article, just summarise some key points. HOWEVER:

      1)The Earth's atmosphere is a fluid environment - filled with tons of water and minerals that both drift in from space and come up from the ground. Jellyfish and squid create "fluid vortices" that they can ride around on (a bit like a helicopter).

      It's like asking how clouds don't fall out of the sky. And remember, jellyfish and squids are invertebrates - they don't have skeletons to weigh them down!

      2)Look on Wikipedia for the Valentich disappearance. The last message received from the unfortunate pilot was a report that "strange aircraft is hovering on top of me again. It is hovering and it's not an aircraft."

      Another example comes from 1959, in Louisiana, when pilots and witnesses on the ground "saw a giant object they said looked like a red mushroom cloud, a mile high. Some said it shot or flashed something at the commercial airliner. The airliner was torn to pieces. Investigators found incredible damage, like no other crash they had ever seen."

      Also, remember that the Earth's atmosphere has five million times the volume of the oceans. It's like asking why ocean liners or submarines never crash into blue whales, and then multiplying the odds of that happening by five million.

  4. I had an encounter with one of these jellyfish entitys 3 years ago. Nov 18th, 2011 in Riverside, CA. Had my neighbor witness it as well. It was massive. You can view the report I filed at the website. The case number is #36360. I'll also answer any questions you might have the best that I can.

    1. Hi Chris, thanks for sharing that! It took me a while to find your report, but I did in the end - hope you don't mind me pasting it here:

      "The 2 weeks prior I had been roofing my house and noticed an object on multiple nights. Too dark to be sure until one night when moonlight was in position to cast a shadow on what appeared as a 5-story down-pointing arrowhead shaped object made of multiple metal plates.

      Spent many hours over the next few days between 11-5 and 11-17-2011 trying to find it, see it or see it better. On 11-18-2011 as it was getting pretty dark out, I walked out my backdoor which faces west and observed a huge glowing, semi-transparent object that looked identical to a 'standard' Jellyfish. Including the same natural swimming motions. Except for instead of a ocean JF's stringy type 'tails', this UFO had 5 or 6 wildly kicking tentacles identical to a 'standard' ocean-dwelling Octopus. Absolutely the most unbelievable thing I could ever hope to see after 50 years of life.

      I was most-likely in shock as I observed it for the first 2 or so minutes. After trying to see something for weeks and then finally see something even crazier, I wasn't totally surprised. But in hind site, I wasn't thinking clearly. A camera/camcorder didn't even enter my mind (???). Luckily, at one point I told myself, "you need another witness".

      I went to one of two apartments behind my house and told my neighbor Linda Vance, I needed her to witness a real UFO. When she followed me out to near my backdoor I turned to her with my back to the object. I pointed to the sky behind me and asked her. "What does that look like to you?" She looked up passed me and stated, "a jellyfish". I don't know why, but I was so relieved to hear he say that. It was like years of pressure was lifted off of my shoulders. But I'm not sure why.

      Later, I remember telling myself we observed the object for 9 minutes total. But I actually don't recall many of the details of the last few minutes of viewing other than Linda went back in fairly quickly as it was unbelievably cold during that November in So California and she wasn't dressed for it.

      Since that 11-18-2011 observation, I haven't seen either object. The jellyfish or the arrowhead shaped UFO. I've found some related info and video on the internet but I plan to keep looking skyward for new sightings whenever I can. I now keep a charged camera with 24/7, too. Just in case."

      I've never happened across a more convincing explanation for UFOs - have you got an estimate of the "size" of the thing? Or how long the tentacles were? Anything else at all, let us know, and thanks again.